And Then He Said...

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Maybe one day I will share my intense (dark) writing on this blog, but today isn't the day.    Instead, I want to share what came from the Holy Spirit the evening of...

And Then He Said

It’s interesting what prayer can do to change your outlook on Evil. Do I believe that Evil is real? Absolutely. I lived with it for many years. Do I believe that in Christ I have the power to overcome it? Absolutely. That is the assurance- the promise- that I live with but often forget. It’s so much easier to live in anger and vengeance. Weird because really, it’s draining. If I just clung to the blessed assurances that I have in Christ, my emotions wouldn’t be sucked dry. Literally sucked dry.

As I lay in bed last night reflecting on my day’s writing, that silent voice said commanded me (once again) to have compassion for you. Let’s be clear- compassion is waaaayyyy different than pity. I do not pity you, I do not feel sorry for you. You are reaping what you have sown. I do, however, feel compassion for you. Unlike you, I have the innate ability to feel for another living being. I can’t say it’s always a fun feeling. Honestly I’d much rather hate you than feel compassion for you. After the emotional, verbal and physical abuse you subjected us to over the years (most signfinciantly over the last 4 years), you don’t deserve compassion. But, guess what. Either do I. But...it’s a good thing that we don’t get what we deserve. I deserve Hell too. My sin is no less dirty than yours. The difference is, my assurance lies in Christ- not my works. My assurance of compassion and forgiveness lies in the promises of Christ and what He did on the cross.

In Romans 12:17-21, The LORD said “ Repay no one evil for evil, but give thought to do what is honorable in the sight of all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all. Beloved, never avenge yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, ‘Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.’ To the contrary, ‘if your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by so doing you will heap burning coals on his head.’ Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good."

I will never take you back. I will never subject myself to your rage, deceit or mockery again. I will never trust your intentions, schemes or stories. I never wish to be in contact with you again.


But...I will never stop praying for you.